Would ISIS dare to attack China? by Joshua Field
Answer by Joshua Field:
A Chinese friend of mine told me this joke:
A few years ago, ISIS did train eight people for many months before sending them on terrorist missions to China.
The first guy’s target was Beijing’s most complex interchange. He passed out due to motion sickness.
The second guy wanted to blow up a public bus in Shanghai during rush hour time. He couldn’t squeeze on any of them.
The third guy’s target was a supermarket in Shanxi. His remote detonator got stolen.
The fourth guy wanted to blow up a restaurant in Sichuan. He died from food poisoning and overly spicy food.
The fifth guy’s target was a luxury hotel in Hong Kong. He got butchered by the Triad before he could even get close to said hotel.
The sixth guy’s target was a military factory in Shenyang. He got lost in the smog and died from air pollution.
The seventh person was actually a woman. She was told to blow up a bar in Henan. She met a human trafficker and nobody has heard from her ever since.
The last guy did actually manage to blow up a building in Jiangsu and kill dozens of people. However, the Chinese media didn’t even report on the incident. When what he did was finally confirmed, it was already too late; he got executed by the organization because they thought he was lying.
After that, ISIS learned to never again mess with China.
EDIT: Since Quora considers my answer to be unrelated to the question, I will explain the logic behind this joke.
Terrorist groups like ISIS are akin to business branches. They send out representatives to make themselves known. However, while a businessman distributes business cards wherever he goes, a terrorist distributes bombings and mass shootings. The terrorist organizations hope to get themselves known through these acts of terror and get more men recruited in the process.
While the general public can only list one or two terrorist organizations such as ISIS or Al Qaeda, the fact is that there’s hundreds if not thousands of islamist terror groups in the Middle East. However, most of the time, you would never hear anything about them, because the media just doesn`t report on them. Indeed, one of the biggest reasons as to why ISIS has been so successful is that the Western Media gives them a lot of attention. It makes sense. Most of Western Media is owned or controlled by big coorperations which means that their primary goal is to make money. How to make money? By getting a lot of sponsors. How to get sponsors? By getting a lot of views. How to get a lot of views? By selling shocking stories. What kind of shocking stories? Stories like these:
OH NO! THE ISIS PIGS ARE USING HUMANS SHIELDS? TELL ME MORE ABOUT THESE DESPICABLE ANIMALS.
WTF? BEHEADED HUNDREDS? I’D LIKE TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THAT.
AND THEY COMMIT GENOCIDE? HOW INHUMANE ARE THEY? PLEASE FURTHER FEED MY ANGER.
Knowing that these kind of news sell, the Western Media often shows them to the public and because of this, ISIS got free advertisement. Plus the politicians need these kind of news to keep getting money for the country’s military budget and “we will go destroy these monsters by financing our army with your money” is a pretty convincing argument to get some angry taxpayer money. ISIS, seeing that their tactics worked, then told themselves that if they keep beheading infidels and raping women they would keep getting more free advertisement. And believe it or not, some fanatic people do actually get convinced and persuaded to join ISIS simply because they so “admire” ISIS violent actions.
On the other hand, China`s media is controlled by the State so it is there to represent the interests of the State. There’s not a single ad during the entire broadcasting of Xin Wen Lian Bo, which is the official national news broadcast. In that sense, the Chinese media has no reason to upset its own population by telling them news about terrorist acts happening inside the country, on the contrary, it has all the reasons to tell the populace stuff like “the GDP increased by 10% last year” or “our hardworking policemen reduced the number of crimes by 10% nationwide”. Plus the main concerns for the CCP are not related to terrorism. They don’t need this excuse to increase their defense budget as they already have plenty of them: South China Sea disputes, East China Sea disputes, gap between them and the US, etc… No, their current main concerns are pretty much all related to economy, health services, food safety, pollution,etc. And this is well shown in their news report.
Seeing that their terrorist actions don`t draw the attention of anyone inside China, ISIS would simply go away just like a businessman would go away and sell his stuff elsewhere if he realizes that nobody in the area is giving him attention.